Adopting a child

Many years back, when I got myself mentally prepared for marriage (that is when my parents were looking for suitable bride grooms for me), I was scared about giving birth to the child. The physical pain and the uncertainty of what I would have to go through scared me.

Later, as I reached 30s, I yearned for a child. I wanted to experience motherhood and go through the whole process. I had no idea what these words meant - trimester, epidural. I understood the concept. That is all I knew.

In one of the serious conversations that me and H had, we discussed about motherhood. While having the conversation, we touched upon the topic of adoption. H told me "R, you don't have to give birth to a child to experience motherhood. That feeling would come in naturally to a woman. It does not matter if the child is your own flesh and blood or an adopted child". It took me some time to understand the meaning of what she said. She told me of her friend who had adopted a child and went on to say that her friend did not feel different just because that child was not her own.

Well, we discussed in length that day about motherhood. We both yearned to settle down in life and experience that phase.

Unfortunately, till date we are both single women, still trying to get married. The yearning for bearing a child has only grown stronger in the last few years.

A few months back, I happened to come across an interview by an actor. She had adopted two girl children while being a spinster. She talked in length about the legal issues she had to face, the time she spent in making the decision and how it changed her world. I was envious of her. The courage and the strength she had in making that decision was commendable. The question was, can I do that. What if I remain a spinster the whole of my life. Too many questions that were not easy to answer.

Yesterday, R had shared a post on how a man who was single and under the age of 30, adopted a child in Mumbai. The story talked about the challenges he faced, what he went through and how happy he is with the child. It was a beautiful story. A story that needs to be talked about and told many times.

Going to the movies alone

A few days back when I had told a friend that I go to theater to watch movies by myself, he was surprised. Apparently, he did not know that people do go to the theaters on their own. When you go out with a group, you rarely take notice of anyone outside your circle. People only see what they want to see.

It all started with my friend H a few years back. We were having this conversation one day when she asked me if I am interested in going for a movie. She had not been to a theater for years. I was in for it but tickets were available only for the morning show. Let us just say I don't usually look forward to getting up early on weekends. When I called her to ask if we can do it some other day, she had already booked tickets for herself for two back to back movies in the same mall.

I was shocked, surprised. It was an idea that had never crossed my mind. So far, I had only gone out with families and friends. Never done it alone. I couldn't let her go alone. How would she fit in with a crowd full of people whom she did not know?? I asked her to book a ticket for me as well. And yeah for just the first movie. I was sure I wouldn't be able to watch two movies back to back. 

We were very sure that we could ask someone to exchange seats at the theater. Boy, I was in for a surprise. No one was ready to move and there I sat two rows in front of her watching a movie all by myself. It just felt strange. I did not feel uncomfortable at all. 

After the show, she talked me into coming in for the next movie and we got the tickets at the theater. It was crazy. While she sat in the back, I got one in the front in between two men. Again, I had no reason to worry. No bad experience. Did not trouble me at all.

I had thought it was a one time experience. After a few months, H had gone ahead for a movie on her own. She told me that since it was a weekday, she was sure I wouldn't want to go. 

That is when I asked myself, when she can go, why can't I go. The first time I booked and went on my own, I was nervous. At least H was in that theater the last time sitting a few rows away. This time, I was just on my own. Then I realized, people don't really care about you. They are all in their own world. I also noticed that there were a lot of people - men and women who just come in alone to watch the movies. It was a great experience. Who said you cannot have fun on your own.

Having said that I don't just go to any movie or any show. Nothing against the people, but I only go to watch Hollywood movies. I am comfortable with the crowd there. No generalizations but that is what I feel. I go only to the day shows and book the tickets only in good theaters.

I have had fun in doing this and it has been a good experience until now. H, as usual was my inspiration. That girl is unbelievable!!!!

Fast and Furious - Hobbs and Shaw - movie review

I like the Fast and Furious series. That is why I had wanted to watch this one in the theater. I booked it after a month it was released in the theaters.

The movie had nothing to do with the usual Fast and Furious series. The car sequences that the series is famous for was missing. They had just one sequence in the climax. That was all. It was just another action flick.

The story line was the usual one - nothing great about it. How many movies have the same plot - saving the world by stopping a deadly virus created by some scientist from ending up in the wrong hands. With the action, they have thrown in some family sentiments - Hobbs with his family and daughter, Shaw with his mother and sister.

I was really disappointed with Statham. Have seen his action movies and had really liked him. He was one of the reasons I had wanted to go and watch this movie. Wondering why he took up this role. He was better than this. Agree with what Hobbs says in the movie- "You have a voice like one of those Harry potter characters".

I did not understand why they had made it a 3D movie. It seemed that they did that just to sell tickets at a higher rate. Had nothing in the movie that really needed a 3D effect. It was actually an overkill.

Having said that, it was a good time pass. Worth watching it once if one wants to just enjoy a good action fast paced movie. And of course, Jason Statham and Dwayne.

Dance performance by kids

A colleague had invited me to a dance performance last weekend. Her two daughters were learning classical dance and this was the salangai poojai function. I have only heard of arangetram functions. This was the first time I heard of a salangai pooja. I later learnt that this is done before the arangetram.

The one I had been to was performed by six young girls. It was a good performance. I completely enjoyed watching them perform. It was amusing to watch the little ones perform. They missed a few steps, one kept adjusting her jewellery (i guess she was scared that it might fall off). They looked at each other to make sure they were not missing the steps. There was just one girl who danced perfectly. After sometime, I watched just her dance. She was really good.

The little ones were all dressed in bright orange, red dance outfits that looked really good. Enjoyed myself after a very long time. I guess I made the right decision in accepting the invite for this function.